I

I am against terrorist attacks
I am against cruelty of any form - be it cruelty to mumbaikars, kashmiri pandits, kashmiri muslims, palestinians, israelis, iraqis. i condemn it.
I am against any religion changed to suit your own purpose.
I am against nuclear warfare, time, money, energy, resources spent making weapons to kill each other. I am against war.
I am against dirty politics - politicians who dont care that all you really want is to live a good life
I am against people who force their beliefs on you.
I am against the trend of becoming immune to violence and people saying "yeh to chalta hee rehta hai" - that is not ok.
I am against things that go opposite to your logic, your kindness.
I am not going to be played by politicians, religious facists who promote their own agenda.
I am not going to lose faith in people. Thanks to nameless employees/people/NSG/police at the hotels who put themselves in the line of fire.
I am for education.
I support the freedom of expression.
I consider right to life as sacrosanct.
I still have hope for tomorrow.
I believe in equality.
I am against poverty.
I am for democracy.
I am against stereotypes because I and so many I know do not fit the cast
I am Muslim
I am Indian
I am Human


This post has been taken from Heena's Blog. She wonderfully stated so much of what I felt. I have added a few things to the original which can be read here. http://life-in-prose.blogspot.com/2008/12/i-i-am-against-terrorist-attacks-i-am.html

Movie reviews Part 1

So in the last couple of months , I have seen an incredible number of movies in the multiplex within the campus(Yes, ladies and gentlemen, the place I work for has a private 1040 seater multiplex for employees only). I therefore thought I would review few of the movies for the few people who sometimes wander onto my blog.

a) Oye Lucky:- Its another Khosla ka Ghosla type of movie. Pure fun to put it mildly. There are no moral messages, only one theif living his life king size. Must watch.

b) Kidnap:- One of the dumbes movies I have seen. The story borders on the realm of fantasy, its full of logical faults, the screenplay is a sham affair. Avoid it at all costs.

c) James Bond-Quantum of Solace:- The latest of the James Bond series, this is one dark dark movies, exploring the idea of revenge as the main theme. The Bond girl in this case is just not a side character. She is essential to the plot and as motivated by rvenge as James Bond. Danil Craig portrays the ultimate killer with not a hint of emotion. Must watch. Gives a lot to think about.

Change is the theme

Anyway this is a thought that came to me the other day. I was back in my home-town after a long time. Now about six months back my dad had shifted to his personal residence from the government accommodation. We had retained that accommodation for nearly 15 years. By army standards this by itself is a record.Mostly officers are posted from one location to another location every two to three years. The families also move mostly. However its one funny tale how we managed to stay in the same location for so long. Dad of course kept getting posted -east,west ,north and south.

But that, alas is not the tale. I am meandering to another side of the story.

Anyway while I did not spend much time there during my engineering I sure did spent a solid 11 years there. So when we actually came near to talking about shifting to another place, I always used to think it would be very hard. I had so many memories about the place. I thought I would forever remember it. So on and so forth.

Anyway so now that I am home ,I passed by the street where our old house was. As I was driving down the street, I instinctively slowed down and peered over the wall. I saw the garden where I had spent so much time playing cricket. I thought a lump was forming in my throat. I was getting emotional.

And then it occurred to me!! I was feeling nothing.There was no nostalgia, no longing , no regrets.

I had moved on.

The same thing happened with Pune. While I loved the city and miss it quite regularly, the fact is I actually miss the friends and the malls etc. And I don't really have all that trouble living elsewhere.

And so here is the message-"I think we all underestimate our ability to handle change". We think we cannot handle it but the truth is we are made of firmer stuff.

Perhaps we are built to dislike change. But we surely are made to handle it.

Foot in the mouth

It appears Indian politicians lose every bit of honour they ever had, once they are elected. To get the votes there appears no depths to which they will not stoop. Indian politicians as a rule live on rhetoric and invalid arguments only.

So we had A R Antulay, the minister for minorities welfare who in his entire tenure has not really done anything useful asking out loud whether the death of the top Maharashtra ATS officers who were probing the Malegaon bomb blasts case was actually part of some conspiracy to eliminate upright officers investigating the case.

Predictably this has caused a furore in political circles with opposition parties baying for his blood. For now however A R Antulay has been labelled by the PM and Congress as misunderstood and represented by everyone.

However Muslims have a reason to be furious with Antulay. By questioning the facts in a case that played out before the entire nation, he is eroding the Muslims case for equality and fairness. As a minister of Cabinet rank Antulay could contribute constructively elsewhere.

Malegaon bomb blasts investigation is a vindication of the voices who said there is likely to be involvement of the Hindu right in bomb blast cases too. The evidence was right there(Nanded explosions) but it took nearly three years for someone to investigate it. The question should be "Why did the CBI dilute the cases against the accused initially " and were there lapses in the investigation initially.

By giving credence to childish conspiracy theories, A R Antulays makes a mockery of the entire Muslim community. Because lets face it that while bomb blasts could be done by anyone, in India it would a very surprising thing if even now anyone else than Islamic extremist groups s could brainwash youth for suicide missions except perhaps the LTTE(even Maoist and the Bodos have more sense). Muslims have done a lot to dissociate themselves as a community from terror through peace marches , edicts and have even gone to the level of denying burials in graveyards for the terrorists. And a little known fact is that a lot of Muslims have died in the terror attacks, indistinguishable from the other victims.

Muslims are not the perpetrators. The perpetrators are terrorists. We are the victims. Just read the names of people who died at CST and Leopold Cafe.

What Antulay remarks do, is shake the foundation that Muslims are trying to create. There should be inquiries into everything about the Mumbai attacks especially how three such senior police officers got killed but the minister should have kept his words to himself. As the minorities minister he implies a link to the minorities.

Moving on however I believe that while the minister was wrong in stating the conspiracy theory, the opposition parties especially the BJP have no locus standi to raise a voice. It is the same party that so vehemently defended "Hindu terror" as just a response to Muslim terror. As an Indian I am offended by the entire act and the silly justifications. Because if the BJP is willing to see even one terrorist acts as a reaction to previous acts, they should then accept most Islamic terror acts in India nothing more than responses to acts that the party and its constituents themselves are responsible for.

I will not accept violence as a means to anything. I will also reject all opinions that belittle one murder as compared to another. An innocent is an innocent,one life is as precious as another.I am a MUslim, I am an Indian, I am also human.(borrowed from Heena's blog)

Anyway read this article. While I do not agree with everything the author says, still he is talking about the right things.

http://www.countercurrents.org/rabbkhan241208.htm

Adios for now

Home, thats where I am

So I am finally at home after six months. The good news is that the project I was working on, got over withh all targets being met. Infact the customer actualy appreciated our efforts. The funny thing is whenever we failed to meet weekly targets we(the state team, ME in my case) got the blasted the next day for sure but when we got apprciated ,the appreciation took a week to reach us. We were in the midst of another meeting where we were being blasted by the manager and the team lead, "Why did you not meet yesterdays target??, this is high risk project ,etc Why do some of you leave by eleven(gosh you leave after 13 hours and they are still glum)", when the manager suddenly goes like,"Last week you met the test pass percentage and the client was genuinely happy with us and appreciated your efforts". And we are all like "Gosh, is it true?". So I wonder why does this appreciation news take so long to filter down to us while al the acidic mails are immediately shown to us.

Maybe they reallly put efforts to ensure our morale is low and we are always feeling sorry about ourselves. SAD EMPLOYEE'S a study found made less mistakes.

Anyway the project is now over and for the time-being I have the bench status but its unlikely to last long. I am expecting to be put on another project soon.

The reason I took leave now is tha it is christmas time and normally its a lean period in the IT industry especially the services sector as all the contracts are being renewed etc, so there is less of work. Also with the present economic situation, its very unsure where I will end up some time down the line.

Thus I decided to club two days of holidays during christmas with the meagre(its actually very less) amount of earned leave I have managed to save( imagine showing up for work for six months each day and ending up with just 7-8 days od earned leave). Anyway I initially planned to be save some of the earned leave for later and take only about a week or max 10 days off. But then my hopes got raised that I would be given compensatory leaves as promised for two saturdays that I had worked beyond the fourteen hours I had put on week-days.

My manager or my ex manager(he ceased to be my manager when the project got over on tuesday) agreed to grant me compensatory leave by using a lacuna in the rules to sort of give me on duty leave. FOr a day I was on cloud nine. But alas some things are not meant. In comes my bench manager who refuses to let me use the facility saying there is no policy of compensatory offs.

But now my imagination had been aroused and the one week that earlier seemed sufficient suddenly seemed so less. So I decided to empty all my earned leaves quota and simply party at home.

So I am now at Allahabad after a twenty four hour plus journey which included two bus journeys, a flight from Bangalore to Delhi and a train journey to add to it.

I sometimes wish that I was closer to home, that it was not so difficult to get home. But then I console my heart and say that some things are probably not meant to be.
"We alwys wonder about the tales that are never written"

Solitude or loneliness??

So I have been feeling very low recently? It appears all the joy has gone out of my life? I think its the weather but the fact that I have put between 12-15 hours daily at work for the last four weeks also contributes to this. Quality of life a theme that I clamour for and also the reason that I swapped from Bangalore( great city but long commuting hours ) to Mysore (idyllic and sleepy city but it takes me five minutes to get to work) has gone into the trash.

To that extent I am genuinely tired. Also I feel loneliness. Normally I enjoy such phases walking head stoically but I have started to crib a lot about the hours.

Can we genuinely work 14 hours and not suffer a burnout down the line. Or even survive to face the next appraisal. Thats the question?

Anyway I normally see solitude and loneliness as different faces of the same coin.

However this quote by Thoreau published in 1859 in a series of essays made me see differently. He says in solitude a person exists with his inner self and there exists the chance for a dialogue and he is not really alone. However loneliness is the desertion of that inner self too and then it becomes genuinely lonely for the individual is alone?

Anyway enjoying a Sunday. Had to work the last four Saturdays too , so Sunday suddenly seems so fleeting and temporal.

Hoping that these insane schedules end soon.

Mumbai Assaulted

Mumbai , the city of a million dreams, the financial capital of our country , the city of bollywood and celluloid dreams was assaulted again by agroup of terrorists.

I look at the news and I feel outrage. How did this happen and how long will this continue? Will those responsible for the murder of so many be ever brought to justice. The terrorists are all dead but this attack speaks of a military precision. This operation was planned for months and the planners deserve to be pursued to the end of the earth , if the need be.

Mumbai will recover. Life never stops in the cities. But the memories of these attacks will remain. So many people died. 14 policemen including two high ranking IPS officers. Fighting an enemy who had come with an intention to murder.

This must stop. This attack signifies a change of tactics. There was a specific targetting of high profile places and western citizens. In these jittery times it could dive away investos from India. 9/11 for US put them into a recession from a downturn.

Also this is no sucide bombing but a sophisticated assault. The problem is police is grossly inadequate to deal with such contingencies. A .306 pistol does not match an AK rifle. Its time to equip the police force and strengthen intelligence.

And lets step up the pressure on Pakistan. Even if their official involvement is nill as they claim the fact is Pakistan is only too happy to allow the militants to flourish in their territory.

Ending with a prayer for all those affected by the tragic incident.

Tired of work

The latest news is I have been loaned from my division IHL to IVS and I am now on a project for a large US insurance company( hint All+S from USA where + refers to concatenation of strings). Anyway each client is referred to as an account and each account may have multiple projects.



I tragically being a fresher am at the very bottom of the hierarchy, thankfully just above the housekeeping. The work is kind of boring. In fact let me confess its very boring. But succour is not far off. I shall move to a development project after some time.

Anyway the fun part is the project I am on has been deemed high risk and is very short. Contractually it will end on december 15th. This involves a different set of pressures.I shall be free after that and shall probably be moved to another project of the same client.



I am having to work with mainframes and a web based application in parallel and its kind of driving me crazy. But dont take this diatribe to imply that I dislike my work. I am enjoying every moment for the experience of it all. Its wonderful to finally enjoy the time spent in production(as contrasted to training).

43 white men and then there was a pause.

"If there is anyone out here who still doubts America is a place where all things are possible, who still questions the power of our democracy. Tonight is your answer." Obama acceptance speech.

A momentous thing has finally happended. A defining moment is history has finally been reached. We have Barrack Hussein Obama as the new US president. The story is inspiring. Son of a black Muslim African father and a white mother whose ancestors once held slaves. While to say he is muslim would be delusional but the fact that he has seen the faith close brings us hope that there could be a greater understanding of the problems surrounding us.

Because as I have repeatedly earlier addressed in this blog the problems that we face on a global scale like terrorism have less to do with religion and more with a sense of injustice and rule of the mighty. There is a PR war out there and Obama who used the internet to such deadly effect should know.

Barrack Obama is also an intellectual ,so we could see genuine logic and reason in his actions insted of the gung ho "Because we can do it, we will do it" that characterised Bush Jr.

And it was a moving moment to see Barrack Obama finally win. And I must confess I became emotional.

Because at every moment there were doubts . People were convinced Obama wont be able to do it. He will never get elected. How can a black man be the president in a country of majority of whites? This is just a red herring! Racism rules in America.

But he did win . And America has taught something to the world.

But the message in even in this defining is a bit flawed. Because the election was Islamaphobic in many ways. And even I accept that I cannot make the man who hates me like me simply because I say its racist to hate me for my religion,sex,sexual identity, or race. However as Collin Powell said "I hear all these Republicans say Obama is a Muslim. The truth is he is a Christian. But the morally and ethically correct answer is how does it matter if he is a Muslim? ".
There is supposed to be a thing that bans discrimination on a number of things including religion. The Republicans forgot it so many times. The Republicans preyed upon people's fears of the worst kind. When Obama was linked to terrorists like J. Wright, the terrorist image recalled wasn't an anti-establishment christian guy but a turban wearing Arab terrorist out loose.

But Obama did win and this moment is his. He deserves the credit for smashing several glass ceilings at one go. May he remain safe from all the dangers and all the folks who would be mouring a black man as president.

Lets see how the world changes in the next couple of years.

There were 43 white men and then came someone called Obama.

Obama or McCain

So the US election date is finally here. All the drama over the past year finally boils down to this day.

 

Poor Hillary would probably be ruminating over a day that should and could have been hers, had not a gentleman with a strange surname name of Obama and Hussein as a middle name stolen the show. I guess she needs a big glass of brandy to get over the day.  We can very well write off her aspirations to be a president as eight years from now (if Obama is elected), she would be way too old.

 

But Obama deserves all the credit. If he was white he could have been mediocre but with the background he comes from, he had to be and has been brilliant to even be inn contention. Everyone waited for his campaign to implode but it never did. His campaign is classic example of a smoothly run machine with little visible internal bickering.

 

Mc Cain on the other hand became a maverick who ceased to amuse. At 72 years old it is very likely he might not survive the next four years. His VP candidate was Sarah Palin, a gun tooting, moose shooting mannequin good only for posters. Imagine someone who claims that she has a special perspective on Russian affairs because she can see it from her home. Someone who did not even have a passport till last year! Sarah Palin probably became McCain’s nemesis. If Obama was not qualified, then Sarah Palin does not even deserve to be in contention.

 

So we have the two candidates- John McCain and Barrack Obama. Who would I vote for if I could. Hmmm as an individual I would any day choose Obama but there is a caveat. I am unsure about his economic ideas especially the line about taxing companies who outsource jobs. Frankly it makes me nervous.

 

It’s not because perhaps I am in the IT industry but more because I believe in the other side of the argument. Outsourcing is saving big bucks for the involved companies. And this money helps the companies grow by giving them that extra bit of capital to expand. McCain is more firm on the economic front. On the other hand I really believe Obama will understand the advantages and not really try to curb out sourcing. Surely don’t give tax-cuts to those who outsource but don’t penalize enough to make the benefits disappear.

 

So, I hope it is Obama 08-12. J

 

Moving on I have to mention that some time back I read Barack Obama’s “Dreams of my Father”. It’s a lovely delicate book chronicling the years of a mixed race kid and the story of his ancestors. I would recommend it as a read. AN interesting idea in the book is that maybe poverty is not the lack of things but an idea in itself that afflicts people telling them that they are poor. Imagine an area where the first white men reached only 130 years better.

 

So if Obama is president we could have an intellectual as a president of the USA. His book betrays a powerful intellect and maybe the world will change. If nothing more there could be more understanding between nations, races and religions.

 

I think I have used too wide a brush to paint tomorrow.

 

Maybe all the polls are wrong. It just might be McCain.

 

Pune or Mysore

So my training with my company finished finally and the postings came. In the two month training, I ended up with a CGPA of 4.89 out of 5 which is nearer the higher end of the spectrum. But then sprang a surprise. I had always nursed a desire to go back to Pune. My Pune, a place where I had spent four years, a place which had taught me so much, a place where mates still abound and a place seeped in old memories. But I got posted to Bangalore. If it was not Pune, it could be anyplace else. With this in mind, I swapped to Mysore which in my judgment would be a better place to live. So now I survive in Mysore.

 

But I miss Pune. And I am still wondering whether I should be on the lookout to swap to Pune. Presently I am but its half-hearted. I am not sure what is attracting me back there. Is it pure logic or remnants of long dead emotions? I will discuss more in further posts. I can just tell you this-A NEW SERIES OF POSTS HAS STARTED. One is Pune fragrances and the second is Mysore diaries.

Genesis-lets start with the novel

The tale is told again and again. With the ravages of time however all is gone except for the tiny fragments of our lives that is told to kids at sunset. But that’s just a tale. Only we know the story of our lives and that is why we need to be able to tell it, to put it down in writing for posterity so that years from now when everyone is gone people can pick it up and say here are lives of people as they were.

Only my story is a little too hard to believe. But true it still is.

In our modern dysfunctional lives we constantly seek to find explanations for our acts, creating new ways to avoid saying we or someone else was simply stupid to act like that. But sometimes maybe in our simple excuses we come closest to diagnosing the problem. I was messed up is a way of saying I did not take the correct decisions. Inability to deal with emotions is simply enough acting in a childish way.

But maybe even I was unable to deal with my emotions for I allowed my emotions to get the better of me. To hope and to wish for an alternate reality is simply living in your dreams. To feel a high in the company of women is a base pleasure but I was addicted to it and could not kick the habit. Maybe I should have gone ahead and tried my luck and maybe I would be cured. But the tale is as it is.

Where do I start? I think I will go back to many years back? Because this is not my tale. This is also of my ancestors

 

Motivation

"The reward for work well done is the opportunity to do more."

 

This line sets me thinking. It’s a wonderful line because it tells us why when we do tough jobs well, we get tougher jobs later on. Lets forget appraisals, annual raises etc. The reason to do good work must come from within. For me at least I am satisfied when I do a job well.  Of course this does not imply that things such as appraisals and recognition are not important. They are crucial but they are not the central reason why I would do a good job.

The Clock of Life by Robert H. Smith

The clock of life is wound but once,
And no man has the power
To tell just when the hands will stop
At late or early hour.

To lose one's wealth is sad indeed,
To lose one's health is more,
To lose one's soul is such a loss
That no man can restore.

The present only is our own,
So live, love, toil with a will,
Place no faith in "Tomorrow,"
For the Clock may then be still.


Came across this lovely poem. Thought I should share it with others.

The story starts

For a long time, I have aspired to do what I desire most-write a story. It appears I have finally found my story. It will take time and there appears to be a serious dearth of time right now but in my mind I can visualize the story already.

 

The only question is can I finish it? And will the tale be as grand as I imagine it to be.

FW: Recession proof your job

We are all hearing bad news left and right. Satyam has axed 4,500 people ,HP has announced cuts of a whopping 26,000 people. So while we may not be affected today , what can we do to make us secure in the future too. Here is something that may help

This article is sourced from http://economictimes.indiatimes.com/quickiearticleshow/3458791.cms

Enjoy reading it.

Recession-proof your job

By C Mahalingam, TOI

All economies and industries go through the cycles of boom and depression. It tests the resilience and tenacity of corporations and individuals alike.

The following quote is attributed to Warren Buffet: "It is only when the tide runs out, we will know who has been swimming naked."

Naked or not, it does hurt every swimmer! The current slow-down is taking its toll in terms of job losses and gloomy scenes at engineering campuses.

Here are some suggestions for IT professionals, to help secure you to your seat during this turbulent weather.

Build your brand:

Building a brand is more than just being visible. Brands communicate certain attributes like trust, value, quality, owner's pride and the like. It would be worthwhile to stand before the mirror and take a test to figure out where we are in terms of these attributes.

Those who score high on all the attributes have a much better chance of their jobs being protected. Professionals can and must evolve into brands and become recognized for their contribution value and dependability.

Be active in social networking sites:

This will help understand where the business is headed and what the industry trends are. By networking with the right people and professionals, you will be able to make sense of the information overload. Find comfort from dealing with positive-minded people inside and outside.

Become an internal trainer:

During difficult times, training budgets are usually scissored to save money. However, smart organizations understand that the cost of not training is much higher than the cost of training. This dilemma is overcome often with identifying talented and competent internal trainers.

They can add tremendous value as they combine technical knowledge with the uniqueness of the organization and its requirements. By opting to be an internal trainer, you increase your value to the organization many-fold and secure your job a lot better!

Walk the extra mile to delight your customers:

The only job security any time (good or bad) is a delighted customer. There simply is no substitute for this. And smart employees know this all the time and go that extra mile every time to delight the customer. So, think smart and hard on finding ways to serve your customer even better.

Stay away from rumour mongers:

During difficult times, the rumour mill is very active. Rumour mills spread negative vibes and usually involve bad mouthing the organization. Being part of this rumour mill only increases the negative emotions and distances yourself from the decision makers.

Be seen in the right crowd and never bad mouth your organizations. Smart employees know the first ones to go during difficult times are those that bad mouth the organizations.

Learn niche skills:

Look around, talk to your managers and HR folks to understand the niche skills that your company is scouting around for. Difficult times also need people who can win new customers and help businesses to stay afloat. Acquiring such niche skills can help you become valuable and many times even critical for business survival. Invest in personal development.

Become a bit of a business scout:

Many of us working closely with clients know what makes our clients lose their sleep and how we can help them get better. It makes your job that much more secure if you contribute to building the business, no matter how small it is. Successful companies have always grown by farming the existing businesses and all of us can play a role in looking for such opportunities.

Build bridges with key people in the organization:

It pays to be in the right company. This is more than making 'fair weather friends'. It means working actively with your managers to keep client delight high at all times, helping colleagues to tide over their problems and helping business excellence teams with process improvements. Organizations tend to care more for such value creating employees even during difficult times.

(The writer is the chief people officer at Symphony Services Corporation)

Old Story New Moral

A popular motivational speaker was entertaining his audience.
Said he: "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife!"

The audience was in silence and shock.
The speaker added: "And that woman was my mother!"
Laughter and applause.


A week later, a top manager trained by the motivational speaker tried to crack this very effective joke at home. He was a bit foggy and out of control after a drink.

He said loudly, "The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who was not my wife!"
The wife went wan with shock and rage.
Standing there for 20 seconds trying to recall the second half of the joke, the manager finally blurted out "... and I can't remember who she was !"

Moral of the story: Don't copy if you can't paste.!

 

The Update

The Update:

 

Well I have been unable to blog for long but I am starting again. So what has happened in the time I was away. I finished my engineering degree spent a wonderdul month at home where I was bereft of the net and then on 28^th July I joined a company as a trainee software engineer.

 

I am not sure if I want to discuss the company much. It has 5 billion dollars of revenue, trains us well and has recently decided to acquire Axon. Oh I gave you a hint. Google it. Anyway I am now in a city called Mysore. Its in the state of Karnataka. Here this company has its training campus. I have been allotted Java stream so once I attain the required level of competencies, I will be be talking object oriented gibberish with byetcode and JVM discussed her and there.

 

The training campus is fully residential but most sites are blocked on the companies net. So I am now blogging through e-mail.

 

Lets see how it goes. Will give you more details later.

 

By the way Happy Ramadan.

 

Loneliness

"I won't cry for my solitude, lay my head and dream of you
And hope that you'll come knocking on my door"

from"Maybe Tomorrow is a Better day" by Poets of the fall.

 

This is the song that comes to my mind, quite frequently. Its a lonely time out here at Infosys training. Everyone is so busy. There are crowds of lonely people. You just need to speak to people to feel that tinge of loneliness and desperation.

There is that tone of regret, the longing of another place. Like my room-mate, who was one of the only two to come from his college. The other person was a gal. They had a decent time in the campus initially. During training sadly people dont mix much. You come with your college mates and you stick with them. But two is company itself. In the isolation the two became great friends, roaming around the whole campus and city together. A fairy tale that should have lasted forever but one that was not to be. About seven weeks into training, the girl was diagnosed with a 9 cm tumor in the stomach. After surgery she has left for her home-town.

Now my roommate is alone. While he doesn't say it, his voice says it all as to how special the girl was for him. He seldom leaves the room after office hours. In fact he doesn't even eat in the food-courts because as he says he just doesn't have company. Yesterday when we went too food-court for dinner he confessed he had not been to an FC for quite some days. I am not sure what he is surviving on but its probabably chips etc.

And this is the tragedy, its just too lonely a world. Even though I emphathize with him, I am just too busy to try anything much. Probably some invitation to dinner nothing much. Because we all have to ourselves haul us out of the rut.

'Loneliness haunts' is the status message of another friend of mine.  We all suffer from it. But as the song says, we choose how to handle it. I am stubborn. "I won't cry for my solitude, lay my head and dream of you. And hope that you'll come knocking on my door". Thats my way.

 

Eureka , it works..

 

;)

Testing ,how to blog through e-mail.

 

 

 

Engineering Over

I am finally an enginner.

The theory papaer got over last week and the project exhibition was held on saturday.

All strings have been cut to college. I only need to come back for results.

I still dont feel nostalgic. Releif maybe. Its been a long long four years but in retrospection they seem to have passed by rather fast.

FOUR YEARS. YES, A WAIT OF FOUR YEARS HAS ENDED.

FINALLY AM OVER WITH UNDERGRADUATE STUDIES.

The writer in me

Anyway here are two small z I took out of curiosity. Five questions and rather amazing result. The second was also small.

Try it out

You Should Be a Romance Novelist

You see the world as it should be, and this goes double for all matters of the heart. You can find the romance in any situation, and you would make a talented romance story writer... And while you may be a traditional romantic, you're just as likely to be drawn to quirky or dark love stories. As long as it deals with infatuation, heartbreak, and soulmates - you could write it.

What Type of Writer Should You Be?

You Have A Type A- Personality

You are one of the most balanced people around Motivated and focused, you are good at getting what you want You rule at success, but success doesn't rule you. When it's playtime, you really know how to kick back Whether it's hanging out with friends or doing something you love! You live life to the fullest - incorporating the best of both worlds

Do You Have a Type A Personality?

Would you die for love????

If the kind of movies watched had any effect on what people turn out to be and believe in, Indians would be the ideal people. Honest, good humoured and very tolerant. Because the average Bollywood movie plot is girl meets guy ,they fall in love, a villain opposes but he fails and they live happily ever after. Never does evil win and murder go unpunished except when they are the viilain's goons.

But sadly that is not true. India is a harsh harsh place divided along casteist and religious lines . While we may like on screen social barrier breaking love stories no one wants to tolerate one in their background.

As an idealist, I believe in the supremacy of love. I believe in the romanticism of the idea of love as the purest emotion.


Maybe I am living in the wrong place. In fact maybe I should migrate to some idyllic liberal country where no one gives a damm what anyone else is doing!

Because to break barriers in India can be dangerous. Because this is India. A place where village panchayats sentence young lovers to death. Where parents murder their daughters and even sons in the name of family honour. Where women are seen as inherently weak who need to be protected and guarded by fathers, brothers and other male relatives. Where marrying outside the caste or community gaurantees social boycott.

And the toll only climbs higher every year. And mostly these murders go unreported , justice is never served and a travesty is called a suicide or a mystery death.

While the metros have become swanky , cosmopolitan places India for most of its part remains heart - brutal. Like an illiterate clothed in a three piece suit, appearance does not matter, the devil is always just below the surface.

Every time I hear about a love for murder I feel anguished. It is the ultimate price to pay for love, the ultimate sacrifice. And I see it daily. My morning dose of newspaper is like a dose of bitter milk. After having read it all, I wish I had not read it just to avoid the senseless pain and disillusionment.

Recently the case of the murder of Nitish Katara got over and thankfully justice was served.

Nitish Katara was a 24 year old business executive in Delhi who was murdered in the early hours of February 17, 2002, by the son of an influential Indian politician. The son of an IAS officer in the Ministry of Shipping, Nitish had recently graduated from the Institute of Management Technology, Ghaziabad. There, he had fallen in love with his classmate, Bharti Yadav, who comes from a criminal-politician family.A trial court on Wednesday found Vikas Yadav and his cousin Vishal Yadav guilty of killing Nitish.

In their own words in a recorded confession which was leaked to the media but could not be used as evidence due to a legality.
"The affair was damaging my family's reputation. I never approved of their relationship. ... Using all my strength, I hit Nitish's head with a hammer. He fainted and after a while he died. We drove one kilometre and then we threw his body onto the road.
Then we took the diesel from our car's tank, poured it on Nitish's body and we set it on fire. Then we drove to Delhi."

Such a tragic waste of life. Tragically the girl retracted her initial statement during the trial and denied being ever involved with Nitish. He died for her but in his death the idea for which he died itself became questionable.

The Yadav family never liked Bharti's liaison, and Nitish had received threats several times. However, he was an idealist, and believed in "standing up to injustice"

But lets not demonise a girl who lost the love of her life. She must have been under immense pressure. It was family after all. Still I wish instead of a life sentence, the brothers had been given the noose. And maybe as a revenge for the act inflicted on her by her family she should have snapped all ties and instead herself asked for the noose for her guilty family.

But why is it that India still cannot accept love marriages. Because love has to be celebrated. We celebrate the love of a mother for a child,love between two siblings, love between friends and so many other places. So what is so wrong about love between a guy and a girl when its not 'arranged'. Cannot society accept them.

"Agar dil mein ho zor to duniya se dushmani kar lo,
Warna jahaan maa-baap kahen wahin shaadi kar lo"

And the above line is true. To marry for love breaking across the hypocritical social lines can be fatal. Nitish Katara could have been any of us. Bright and well educated, his relationship with Bharti was nothing out of ordinary.

No one deserves to die like he did-"hit by a hammer and burnt by the roadside."

In India there is an emphasis on arranged marriages. They worked for our parents and even at 22 or however old I may be it seems I am incompetent to choose a partner. I say this. Love is finally the pursuit of happiness. As parents if the child decides to pursue happiness himself it should not be an issue. They should be happy. But parents seldom are, forever warning boys of morally loose girls and girls of being fooled by guys. Also only an idiot would deny inter-caste marriages face a lot of pressure and lets not talk about inter-religious marriages where I think all couples should be given a gold medal for bravery. They after all crossed the final lines.

So I ask my musing "Was it worth it?" Is love worth the ultimate sacrifice? Or can we simply move on throwing love in the closest dust bin when the going gets hard.

And maybe the question we all have to ask ourselves. How far can we go for love.

What Dreams May Come!!!

As a kid I was plagued by nightmares. They would haunt my nights an there were times when I was even afraid to go to sleep. Now this is a long long time back . I was around six seven years old then. Of course a reason could be the fact that I lived in the mountainous regions and at night it used to be dark as hell. During winters lions and tigers would come down from the higher altitudes and there would be frequent wild encounters. Enough to scare a seven yeaqr old.

So my dreams used to revolve around being chased by ghosts and getting lost in the jungles or getting separated from my family at a railway station(Coz I was hopelessly addicted to getting off at stations to run to the magazine n book vendors and a train we frequentely travelled with used to be divide into two trains heading to diff directions at a station. U could get into the wrong coach n end up elsewhere).


Anyway once we left Joshimath and I added some more years, the nightmares decreased and my fears lessened. Nightmares were not an issue anymore.

But I still had dreams and a few nightmares on and off. However I beleive in will and when I was in class tenth I desired to control my dreams and end them. Now this is a big secret that I am letting you onto but the fact is we can control our dreams.

I read about an experiment where flashing of red light on patients during REM(rapid eye movement ) phase i.e. when they are dreaming instantly ended dreams.

I relied on pure logic. Before sleeping everyday I used to tell myself a dozen times I am going to sleep. Also I came to the conclusion nothing illogical could happen. SO now when I
used to dream I started trying toi ask myself how did I end up there. The moment I used to reach the blank part I used to realize it was a dream. ANd voila immediately that dream used to stop. It was not necessary that I would wake up, sometimes one dream would be replaced by another ,often very pleasant. Also like if I was being chased I used to suddenly say "what the hell" and stop running. This one dream when I did so I still remember the abrupt end of that nightmare and the change to another dream. It seemed everything around me dissolved and a new landscape formed on a blank canvas.

However with time my nightmares became less frequent but so did my dreams.
And then a time came when there were none at all. For months I did not have a dream or at least one that I could recollect. The sleep was good. I used to wake up refreshed.

But there is something about dreams ,they have this magical quality that real life can never replicate.

And after many years I started missing them. So I stopped reminding myself that I am sleeping and also searching for arbitrariness during sleep.

And the dreams returned. Slowly but surely. And now again my nights are filled with dreams.

I have debated about it but I am sill unwilling to start controlling them again.

Anyway what I also want to speak about is this dream I had so50-60 days back. There is this gal, I was senti on big time but it ended at that only. I gave this crush a quite burial and moved on.

Of course she also did something that I felt humiliated me and though she apologized, some things are jhust too bgrave to be forgotten by an apology.

So I buried her, as a matter of saying of course.

Or so I thought.

Anyway I slept in the afternoon one day and I had this dream that where she was there.

We just walked around hand in hand and even in the dream a warm feeling enveloped me.
Then I woke up.

However I felt good for days afterwards, cheerful like a bird. What i had thought was dead had risen from the grave. This despite the fact that I am reconciled to the fact that nothing is possible on any front. The power of a dream

So here's my musing "what is it about dreams that we can't live with them and neither without them"

Photoshop exp

I had always wanted to dabble with Adobe Photoshop. Its great I am finally doing it.

Here is some of my stuff

Trip to Haji Ali

{The pics are not mine. They are sourced from wikipedia}

Some months back I ended up at Haji Ali , a dargah in Mubai when I went there for a b-school interview.

Haji Ali is a dargah about 500 meters off shore. I had hoped to visit it and I was lucky that my interview venue was just off Haji Ali street. However I did not know this and after my interview was over I tried in vain to get a taxi to take me to the venue. Only after a helpful taximan gave me directions did I realize that the dargah was only walking distance.

Anyway I start walking and only when I reach the end of the street do I see the Arabian Sea and the Haji Ali Dargah glistening in the sun. It was a rather hot day and I had wore a blazer to the b-school interview which of course I had in my arms but I was still sweating from all the walking.

As soon as I got onto the pathway leading to the Dargah I could feel the atmosphere change. It became pleasantly cool. I then walked to the dargah , entered , took off my shoes, paid my obeisances at the dargah and basically stood around savouring the environment. There was something spiritual about the place. Since it was near a time, I also did vazu and offered prayers.

However the dargah held in esteem by millions is in a dillpated state. That is simply unacceptable. Reading up on the web I realized that the management of trustees are suspected of embezzling money that comes in daily. Also there are some permissions which need to be sought.

Its sad though how the protectees become the exploiters. Great power involves great responsibility. It would be nice if people were to believe in it too.

I think its sad how trustees misuse funds meant for charity. There must be more accountability and stricter punishments.

Anyway hoping renovation on the Dargah is done soon.

Ameen

Bomb Blasts in Jaipur

Breaking news has it that Jaipur or the pink city as it is sometimes called has been hit by serial bomb blasts. The estimates that I just read point to 15 dead and over a hundred dead.

This would be the another of a series of bomb blasts that have rocked India in the last couple of years. While some have been solved, most of the bomb-blasts cases remain unsolved. Unknown and outside forces cannot be forever blamed. It has to stop.

Bomb blasts are one of the most dastardly acts of terror possible because unsuspecting innocents are its victims. The condemnation has to be strong. However when the political bitching starts tomorrow, let instead of pointing fingers the emphasis be on cracking these cases. And as I have so recently pointed out let there be sensitivity while doing so.

Anyway the point is there are too many terrorist attacks in the recent past which have simply been lost from memory. No trial, no one to blame , nothing.

This has to stop. The life of the innocent is as precious as that of the VVIP.

Hoping that the dead find peace, the injured heal and the terror attacks cease.

Signing off or now.

What I want to blog about?

While I have not been blogging much recently because of a serious time crunch and more tragically hardware problems, I have nevertheless a lot of topics in the queue that I want to blog about. Before I loose them as I surely will lemme list them so that I can look it up later and keep cancelling those done.

By the way have an oral exam tomorrow and have not studied one word. Its going to be a long night.

1.) Visit to Haji Ali
2.) Holi at AIT
3.) What dreams may come
4.) My this years ghazal
5.) Farewell , graffiti and the tragedy at my college
6.) Why I blog??

The lessons of Engineering

I think the most important lessons of engineering are to be learnt outside the class room. Engg more than a humongously large number of subjects each semester has to be about surviving on your own. If you are lucky as I am, you will live in a hostel and there will be no place to run away from all the troubles of life. Conflicts will literally follow you to your room. You will grapple with roommates some of them pleasant and the rest outrightly hostile and at one time or the other even the best will go through a snapping and biting phase.

Everything you own will be at risk of being permanently borrowed and u will be
lucky if u dont loose some stuff or the other each week.

There ain't no mom or dad to run too. You have to stand your ground even if there is the threat of wider conflict.

There is nobody to turn to in case of an illness. You lie in your bed fully miserable with a line or two of consolation from a buddy.

You grapple with impossible deadlines. U meet some and others simply pass by like long over crushes.

This is no joke. This is life.

But this is the whole advantage of engg. The lessons one learns are the lessons of life. For future MBA Grads these are worth their weight in gold. Because there is no easy way to learn these lessons. Tuorials cant help anyone here.

Expeience often comes from previous poor judgement.

Engineering Zindabad

Down a meandering road

Well this is my memoir finally done. Read it and give me feedback.
Many people at the end of college state that how much they will miss college, friends and wish that there still was time before they passed out. I would like to state that I am GLAD to pass out. While some regret the passing of an era; I celebrate the dawn of another epoch.
As an FE, SE and most desperately as a TE I wanted to write a memoir in the magazine. However I thought a memoir was too hallowed an act for anyone else than a BE to write. I often wondered how would a 4 year long story sound like? Now that I finally sit down to pen down this memoir, words seem to have deserted me.
AIT in my case is a story that nearly never was. With a rather high AIEEE merit I chose to take admission to NIT Warrangal. But blame fate or the Naxals who ambushed the same district the next day, my decision got vetoed by my parents. So I landed up at the gates of AIT flabbergasted by how quickly the best laid plans unravel. Thus began the tale of my FE.
My first year room mates and I were ghazal aficionados. Ghazals used to be belted out from my music player all night long. The music would set the tone for the whole flank.Desperate times need desperate measures. To escape certain not so welcome seniors, we got habituated to sleeping at five in the evening and waking up at two at night to do the journals. Of course as part of an all FEs flank in ground G we were better off than many others. But still.
Here I got nicknamed ’Huzoor’. Though only my flank mates who coined the name can fully explain why but I will try to give a hypothesis. My hostel dress was a rather elaborate kurta-payjamas and after twelve at night I used to roam the flank searching for journals to copy and for 'bakar' sessions. Thanks to an intentionally illegible writing and drawing , I used to distribute work to others on behalf of seniors and never really be the one doing it. My royal style I believe in the end got me named ‘Huzoor’. In fact the name later on became so popular many of my batch mates knew me only by my nickname for a very long time.
It was in my first year also that I became part of the Magazine Board. And it’s the Mag Board that makes the whole AIT experience worth the trouble. Strange how it began though! I nearly didn’t make it to the interviews because the news never reached me.Mag Board has moulded me in many ways by giving me wonderful oppurtunities to pursue what I desired.Even as a BE now, when the old have given way to the new, Mag Board still has a special corner in my heart. And this feeling may last forever. I look at ‘eMAGe’ and I know that a whiff of me shall remain in every following issue.
Engineering is not a degree. It’s an experience. The submissions are “mission impossibles”. Engineering at AIT has been fun to put it mildly. Of course maybe I had too much fun, but then again no regrets. Tragically not all papers are one-night stands. Its only in engineering that one recognizes the importance of a 40. As part of a batch which had a history of mass downs I am proud to say I shared all the experiences. EDC ,T.O.C. and M-III for the AIT Comp batch of 08 probably were the biggest obstacles in the completion of engineering. But the clouds did part and most of us cleared those subjects sooner or later.
Four years of lectures seem so insignificant right now. But there are so many memories. Megha smacking her head against the desk with explosive force during a dozing moment. Anurag Chopra trying to divert a question by saying “This is so easy that even Ankush can explain it. Varun Singh coming to lectures after two weeks and having a doubt within ten minutes. Garima whose voice was enigmatically elusive.Praneet getting up in class to be dangerously frank.Santosh Rathore and his improntu khattes. Chits being passed in class. As for myself I can only hope that people remember me.
Nearly four years have passed since I came to AIT. I look back at the Ashraf of that age and I can’t recognize myself in the mirror. I see a stranger. The loss is perhaps of that elusive thing called innocence. And it is true for each and everyone of us. We lie a little too much, are a bit too cruel and cunning at the edges and are just too self-centered for comfort. Like the mighty Beowolf of the legend I believe we have made a pact with the devil. The only question is will the price that we shall pay worth the pact.
Finally as I end my final article for Srijna,I feel an unexpected tug at my heart. It’s a long association coming to an end. Kudos to Comp Dept for being so wonderful to all of us, ciao Mag Board and a round of cheers to all my friends and everyone else whom I have been unable to name for the lack of space.
There are moments and friends I shall always cherish. While there will be friends who shall remain close fighting a duel with time, others shall drift apart. This is fate. But I hope that whenever I shall come across any batch mates, we shall not eye each other as strangers but embrace each other as long lost friends.
Amen.
Syed Ashraf Husain
B.E. Comp

A very moving tale

A very moving and enjoyable forward. I liked it. Hope you all also do the same.

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty.

He said...NO.
She asked him if he would want to be with her forever
...and he said NO.

She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again he
replied with a NO.

She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the
boy stopped her and said..
You're not pretty you're beautiful.
I don't want to be with you forever, I NEED to be with you forever.
And I wouldn't cry if you walked away...I'd die...

A forced hiatus

Well I have not blogged much in March . The reason is that my computer has gone bonkers. Blue Screens of Death seem to be my best friend

For some strange reason my windows installation keeps on crashing. I would format my comp and it would crash again. Infact on one particularly irritating day I installed windows thrice. One could imagine the irritation.

Anyway it turned out my hqard disc has had bad sectors for some time and maybe the hard disc is the problem. But I have a 160 Gb hard disc and its nearly impossible to do a complete format.

I have changed cables and now I am typing with crossed fingers

For nearly 8 days I just did not feel like jostling with the comp again

Lets see if it works

My Big Fat Greek Wedding

This is the recommended movie of the week.

I had this movie on my system for a long long time but could only watch it yesterday.

My Big Fat Greek Wedding is a wonderful movie not because it entertains us but more so that it explores the subtle realities that surround each and every culture.

The plot synopsis from wikipedia
"
The movie is centered on Toula, a Greek-American woman , who falls in love with a non-Greek American, Ian Miller . The movie also examines the protagonist's relationship with her family, with their cultural heritage and value system, which is sometimes rocky but ends with mutual appreciation.
"

Now my point. The movie is great great entertainment. Typical candy romance. Just multi-flavoured.

One of the most beautiful moments in the movie comes when Toula has some doubts on whether it could work. Because though her family managed to accept the to be groom, still she knew a tradition is

"Listen Tula my village saw many wars. Turkish, German. They all made a mess. But my mother said we are lucky. We are lucky to be alive. And I thought we are not lucky to be alive. We are not lucky when they are telling us where we should live, what we should eat.

Nobody , has that right.

And then I see you.And I see Adena and Nichol(siblings of Toula). We came here for you. So you could live. We gave you a life so you could live it."

Its a very liberating statement and the movie ends on a happy note sometime later.

A lot of fun is poked at the oddities of Greek culture in the movie but its just for fun.

A must watch. Even if one has to rent the DVD.

Terror in my Name?

A terror cell has recently been busted in Bangalore, the Silicon-Valley of India(no, it has nothing to do with certain implants in strategic areas). With the arrest of an MBBS student last month followed by an engineer working for a software firm, it appears now even educated Indian Muslims are in danger of radical indoctrination.

An idiot and a misguided fool makes life difficult for the rest of us. No one can deny that terrorism in the name of Islam is a big problem , not only for the world community, but even more so for Islam itself. But Islam has nothing to do with terrorism. Its the ideologies of terror who derive inspiration from Islam that are creating all the trouble. There is a simple reason why the argument that the Quran or Islam is the cause of terrorism is fallacious. There are a billion plus Muslims in the world. If even ten percent were involved in terrorism , streets would be bathed in blood.

Terrorism like most other things is a political weapon. Other than the Palestine cause there was no other movements which could be labelled terrorists for much of the twentieth century. Then came the Soviets who attacked USSR and suddenly radical Islam seemed to be a new weapon against communism for those in power. So the Mujahideen were funded , trained and armed to take on the Soviet army. The funds did not come from Muslim countries. They came from the west.Paradox aint it. And they did win. The deserts of Afghanistan still contain the bodies of thousands of Soviet soldiers. They died as pawns fighting a war that was just a game between two superpowers. 2000 soldiers are still missing in action nearly 25 years after the war ended.

These mujahideen after the win had nowhere to go . So they migrated to every hotzone possible.

Pakistan used terrorism as a political weapon to spread insurgencies in various parts of India especially Punjab and Kashmir. The 20 year militancy has killed over 20000 people in Kashmir itself.

Many people claim terrorism is in Islam is in the name of Muslims itself. And so moderates must stand up and protest. However much mainstream muslims try to distant themselves from the fringe elements, it is seemingly not enough.

They do not accept the fact that things are being done within the community in many places. Also Islam is not all that homogenous a religion as many would like to beleive it. There are sects and there are ideologies and Islam varies from country to country.

Things could always be better. But the fact remains Islam has no united leadership. In India itself since independence there has been no tall Muslim leader.So whatever changes are being made are being done in rather trying circumstances.

So find the fringe elements and prosecute them as law allows. But don't go overboard and make the average Muslim feel humiliated and threatened. No one wins if the authorities lose the battle of hearts and minds.

The reason is simple . Islam teaches loyalty to both the religion and state. Both of these loyalties go hand in hand. The loyalty to the state is a powerful force. So the police and investigating teams must be sensitive enough not to make innocents question their loyalties. Also a lot of people and organizations are trying to reform Islam, improve the levels of education , encourage dialog etc. Don't suspect these organizations because they work with muslims.

It must be remembered that the terrorist philosophies are just those -philosophies. Indian Islam in particular has a lot of emphasis on tolerance and cohesiveness of humans as a race. It's Sufism.

In the end I say one thing. When a terrorist act occurs, punish the offenders. Know the fact I don't support violence.

Because the terrorist were terrorists.

The violence wasn't in my name. Because I never gave them the power. Ever.

Two great great videos

The best wedding dance EVER. You gotta see this. Lovely idea.

WhoIsTheMonkey.com

The next has to be the video of the year. Iwatched the whole video and I actually cried. Anyway all the text that follows has been taken from, whoisthemonkey.com . Please read the article because that will help you in understanding it all

[From Sports Illustrated, By Rick Reilly] I try to be a good father. Give my kids mulligans. Work nights to pay For their text messaging. Take them to swimsuit shoots.

But compared with Dick Hoyt, I suck.

Eighty-five times he's pushed his disabled son, Rick, 26.2 miles in Marathons. Eight times he's not only pushed him 26.2 miles in a Wheelchair but also towed him 2.4 miles in a dinghy while swimming and Pedaled him 112 miles in a seat on the handlebars--all in the same day.

Dick's also pulled him cross-country skiing, taken him on his back Mountain climbing and once hauled him across the U.S. On a bike. Makes Taking your son bowling look a little lame, right?

And what has Rick done for his father? Not much--except save his life. This love story began in Winchester , Mass. , 43 years ago, when Rick Was strangled by the umbilical cord during birth, leaving him Brain-damaged and unable to control his limbs.

"He'll be a vegetable the rest of his life;'' Dick says doctors told him And his wife, Judy, when Rick was nine months old. ``Put him in an Institution.''

But the Hoyts weren't buying it. They noticed the way Rick's eyes Followed them around the room. When Rick was 11 they took him to the Engineering department at Tufts University and asked if there was Anything to help the boy communicate. ``No way,'' Dick says he was told. ``There's nothing going on in his brain.''

"Tell him a joke,'' Dick countered. They did. Rick laughed. Turns out a Lot was going on in his brain. Rigged up with a computer that allowed Him to control the cursor by touching a switch with the side of his Head, Rick was finally able to communicate. First words? ``Go Bruins!'' And after a high school classmate was paralyzed in an accident and the School organized a charity run for him, Rick pecked out, ``Dad, I want To do that.''

Yeah, right. How was Dick, a self-described ``porker'' who never ran More than a mile at a time, going to push his son five miles? Still, he Tried. ``Then it was me who was handicapped,'' Dick says. ``I was sore For two weeks.''

That day changed Rick's life. ``Dad,'' he typed, ``when we were running, It felt like I wasn't disabled anymore!''

And that sentence changed Dick's life. He became obsessed with giving Rick that feeling as often as he could. He got into such hard-belly Shape that he and Rick were ready to try the 1979 Boston Marathon.

``No way,'' Dick was told by a race official. The Hoyts weren't quite a Single runner, and they weren't quite a wheelchair competitor. For a few Years Dick and Rick just joined the massive field and ran anyway, then They found a way to get into the race Officially: In 1983 they ran another marathon so fast they made the Qualifying time for Boston the following year.

Then somebody said, ``Hey, Dick, why not a triathlon?''

How's a guy who never learned to swim and hadn't ridden a bike since he Was six going to haul his 110-pound kid through a triathlon? Still, Dick Tried.

Now they've done 212 triathlons, including four grueling 15-hour Ironmans in Hawaii . It must be a buzzkill to be a 25-year-old stud Getting passed by an old guy towing a grown man in a dinghy, don't you Think?

Hey, Dick, why not see how you'd do on your own? ``No way,'' he says. Dick does it purely for ``the awesome feeling'' he gets seeing Rick with A cantaloupe smile as they run, swim and ride together.

This year, at ages 65 and 43, Dick and Rick finished their 24th Boston Marathon, in 5,083rd place out of more than 20,000 starters. Their best Time? Two hours, 40 minutes in 1992--only 35 minutes off the world Record, which, in case you don't keep track of these things, happens to Be held by a guy who was not pushing another man in a wheelchair at the Time.

``No question about it,'' Rick types. ``My dad is the Father of the Century.''

And Dick got something else out of all this too. Two years ago he had a Mild heart attack during a race. Doctors found that one of his arteries Was 95% clogged. ``If you hadn't been in such great shape,'' One doctor told him, ``you probably would've died 15 years ago.'' So, in a way, Dick and Rick saved each other's life.

Rick, who has his own apartment (he gets home care) and works in Boston, and Dick, retired from the military and living in Holland, Mass. , always find ways to be together. They give speeches around the country and compete in some backbreaking race every weekend, including this Father's Day.

That night, Rick will buy his dad dinner, but the thing he really wants to give him is a gift he can never buy.

``The thing I'd most like,'' Rick types, ``is that my dad sit in the chair and I push him once.''

Three cheers for Dick Hoyt. May Allah give everyone the courage to be such patient parents.
ENJOY