Another semester ends in a way I never hoped it would. From a high I ended up in a low low position.
'Srijna', the college magazine is out but I wonder if it took too much while coming out. 40 days of labour with only one thing on my mind was cumbersome. Feel exhausted, empty like a burnt out candle sputtering in the wind for a lack of wax. That's me. Of course a big lesson that I learnt is that one cant please everybody. After having done a superb job of a magazine and published an issue which has to be the best as compared to the last few years ,some people still have the chutzpah to trash the magazine. Of course it just one class which has a problem and that also is created by them as they only gave crappy one-liners for each other. Does not really bother me much but I could have done without it.
On a more sadder tone, events with sum1 special came to a head and when the time came to ask the big question got the weirdest answer possible. If it was a no,I could have handled it but it was something like-I think of u differently. The more vexing problem is I know she liked me. Maybe I waited too long. Maybe it was just not meant to be. So in another miserable effort to console myself, I must state it saved me a lot of future trouble.
So its back to single and not ready to mingle for me. Some things are just too painful, some ends just too raw.
Also 'Imagine Cup' for which I worked rather hard these last couple of months also ended
at a dead end when it all came to a naught after I failed to clear round 2.
I think its the cascading effect of all the above events which make this all so dark for me. Dont really care more.
The conflicts with the 4th year students where I was not even involved , the Srijna hater lot leave a bad taste in my mouth. This place is getting to me. Need a break. But I cant.
4 comments:
The weathering of a magazine board sec. i cant understand,but i can imagine.
one of most criticised lot,i think the dolts here should read this blog.
nice work. feelings put down fluently Ace..
Yup,its a fun job but only in bits n pieces.
And its very tiring!! I dont want to see another Srijna for a long long time.
Thanks for the comments though.
there's always a critic, and you CANT pls everyone. and it happens, you just have to move on and put it behind you. i personally think if she said no it would be worse. things happen coz they are meant to happen. if they dont, there is some reason behind that too. and at the time we dont understand it and sometimes we never do, but we have to believe that its for the best. =). be happy.
I wonder if a straight no would be worse. At least I could have said it was never meant to be.
The problem is the excuse makes me the guilty party and I have to wonder whether I was hallucinating through the year.
It was not like I suddenly walked up and said I saw you yesterday and I like you to a stranger.
But its over
And I am on the path to recovery
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